Ed Sheeran Killed As ‘Hug A Ginger Day’ Takes A Dramatic Turn
946 teenage girls are today being held by police in London under suspicion of murder following the discovery of musician Ed Sheeran’s mangled and torn apart corpse in the street.
The famously ginger singer was doing a CD signing which went tragically wrong when hundreds of girls out on a ‘Hug a Ginger Day’ rampage spotted the ‘Lego House’ singer and began to give chase at approximately 2pm.
It is believed the girls followed him to an alley and began to kiss him before eventually tearing him from limb to limb all while singing the hit song ‘Drunk’.
‘This Kiss a Ginger’ thing has gotten way out of control. You just can’t grab any old ginger on the street and kiss them, let alone rape, mutilate, and then take selfies beside their mangled corpse’, according to London Police Chief Martin Cooper.
All that remains of the once smiling guitarist are some ragged pieces of denim, a half torn Nirvana t-shirt and scattered locks of red hair.